In Arlan Hamilton’s book, “It’s About Damn Time”, she shares a list of 17 songs that help her feel empowered.
I was recently reading Arlan Hamilton’s book, It’s About Damn Time: How to Turn Being Underestimated Into Your Greatest Advantage. In Chapter 2, Part 6, she included tips she’s found helpful when she’s about to give a speech or a talk. The tips are to help combat imposter syndrome and other normal feelings of insecurity. Her first tip 1 is to listen to songs of empowerment and she shared her list of songs. I decided to write the list down and give the songs a listen, and see if her songs empowered me.
Rather than hunt down audio tracks, I searched YouTube and created the list below.
17 Songs of Empowerment
Get Up 10, Cardi B
Battle Cry, Angel Haze ft Sia
New Agenda, Janet Jackson
Skyscraper, Demi Lovato
Price Tag, Jessie J
Red Light, Johnny Ling
Follow Your Arrow, Casey Musgraves
Roar, Katy Perry
Keep Your Head Up, 2 Pac
Fly, Rihanna & Nikki Minaj
All I Have, NF
Run This Town, Jay-Z ft Rihanna and Kanye West
This Moment, Janine
Somebody Loves You, Betty Who
Well, I don’t know how empowered I feel after this list, but I still think this is a great exercise. I should come up with my own list and see what I can create. It would be nice to have a list to listen to before work or any time I want to feel a little push.
There’s more to be found about Arlan Hamilton, her book, and her venture capital firm, Backstage Capital, at itsaboutdamntime.com.
From January 12-25, 2022, The Jewish Museum and Film at Lincoln Center are delighted to continue their partnership to bring you the 31st annual New York Jewish Film Festival, presenting films from around the world that explore the Jewish experience.
Thanks to the magic of the internet, I got to attend this festival online for the first time. Thanks to work schedules and whatnot, I only watched 3 films. Despite my love of film festivals, yet limited film viewing, I was quite impressed with how many films, and even TV shows, there were to experience.
One thing I neglected to do was watch and pay attention to all of the Q&As. Usually Q&As follow film screenings, when they’re held in person, so all you have to do is remain in your seat. This time, I was just happy I was able to make time to watch the films.
Anyway, here are the 3 films I watched, in the order I watched them, plus some additional thoughts and details about the films.
With No Land (2021)
In May 1991, 15,000 Ethiopian Jews were airlifted to Israel in less than 24 hours’ time. Known as Operation Solomon, this covert mission coordinated by the Israeli military saw the birth of eight babies en route and set the world record for the most passengers on a single aircraft. History regards the endeavor as an unqualified triumph, but 30 years later, the full story is being told. Aalam-Warqe and Kobi Davidian delve into the details that have been suppressed for all this time, and explore the desperate but motivated measures taken by Jewish Ethiopian activists in Israel, North America, and their country of origin. Archival footage and firsthand accounts of participants lend nuance to a story heretofore viewed as black and white, supplemented by accounts of recent efforts to finally relocate to Israel those whom Operation Solomon left behind.
I’m not sure I knew much about the history of these events prior to watching the film. Although the summary of the film is about the 1991 airlift, much of the film goes into events that happened prior to that — about the Ethiopian Jews who had been allowed into Israel earlier than 1991, how families were split up, how some were reunited — and how Israel refused to accept Ethiopians despite their religion.
There was also a historical account of the political and military situation within Ethiopia, and how other countries and NGOs explicitly or secretly cooperated with the plans to relocate Jewish Ethiopians. Some had fled to Sudan while others remaining in Ethiopia were stuck between two fighting contingents — which seem to have renewed their conflict recently, again, if it ever went away.
But a very interesting film and I’m glad I learned more about it. There is definitely more information about Operation Solomon to be found online.
Here’s a 5-minute video from the BBC:
Cinema Sabaya (2021)
Nine women of divergent backgrounds enroll in a video production seminar that promises to teach the fundamentals of filmmaking. These residents of Hadera, Israel are Jewish and Arab, observant and secular, ensconced in all manner of domestic arrangements, with life spread out before some of them and regarded by others in hindsight. Strangers to one another (one of the Jewish attendees has never interacted with Arabs until now), the students share the common goal of self-expression through their cameras, with Tel Aviv–based filmmaker Rona (Dana Ivgy, acclaimed star of Or and Zero Motivation) supplying instruction. Orit Fouks Rotem casts her debut feature with a mix of seasoned and nonprofessional actors, all shooting their own footage and viewing their colleagues’ work for the first time on screen. Sparked by former workshop leader Rotem’s personal experiences, Cinema Sabaya presents a deft and never didactic portrait of art’s capacity to unite disparate communities.
The description seems provocative, like maybe this will be a story about Arabs and Israelis. Instead, the story was much more about the lives of the women, how free they felt at expressing themselves, and the support they gave each other while revealing sensitive aspects of their lives.
For instance, one of the Israeli women seems at first grating and displays, maybe, this “toxic positivity” I’ve been reading about. She seems overly positive, very smiling…until she reveals that she hasn’t really interacted with an Arab person. She said, during the suicide bombings in Israel (before the wall), she crossed the street whenever she saw an Arab person. Later, during the course of sharing her filming assignments, it turns out her home life is not as positive as she appears to be. Her husband is withdrawn, likely suffering from PTSD. Her daughter doesn’t want to engage with her, and so forth.
Another woman tells the group she has had to move herself and her children back in with her mother after leaving her husband. Her dream is to buy an apartment. During one of her video assignments, it’s revealed that she and her kids are living in a single bedroom with all the stuff she was able to grab when she quickly left her husband. It’s a very crowded and cramped room, and clearly not a place where she or her children can thrive.
In another instance, a Muslim Arab woman, with 6 children, shares her dream of getting a driver’s license so that she doesn’t have to rely on her husband so much. Later in the film, the group role plays and acts out scenes where they pretend they’re confronting someone in their life about whatever dream they have. This woman plays herself and another woman plays her husband, and seems to accurately portray his dominant role in their marriage and her life. The Muslim Arab woman essentially gives up the argument when her partner declares, role-playing her husband, that he has decided she doesn’t need a license and he’s made up “his” mind. The rest of the group tries to encourage her to continue and just pretend, and to say what she feels even if she wouldn’t say it in real life. In a cathartic moment, she reveals that she regrets ever meeting her husband or marrying him at all. She reveals that she hates that he touches her, hinting at sexual aggression within the marriage. It’s clear she holds in her feelings of contempt for her husband. When the other woman tries to push her a little bit, to “give her courage”, the Muslim Arab loses her composure and attacks the woman by pushing her down, and then runs out of their community center. She disappears for the next few sessions, only to reappear on the day when they receive their completion certificates.
I felt it was a very interesting story about the motivations and, not spectacular, but plain dreams of women, and how their wants are withheld or thwarted often by the men in their lives or by expectations for women to support or be the center of the family.
An invaluable record of tight-knit communities that endured genocide and shifting political regimes, Shtetlers offers a glimpse at the small Jewish towns (“shtetls”) dotting the former Soviet Union—towns where for many years Yiddish continued to be spoken and ancient rituals dutifully observed. Located on the fringes of the territory, in what are now Ukraine and Moldova, these villages that withstood the Holocaust managed to abide by supplying non-Jewish neighboring towns with goods and services. Director Katya Ustinova examines nine former shtetl inhabitants, now spread out across the world, and solicits their memories of a resilient but ultimately vanishing way of life. Ustinova’s documentary serves as an elegy for these once numerous strongholds of tradition and culture, but also, by archiving the recollections of those who experienced them firsthand, preserves them.
For this film, I did watch the Q&A, because I started writing this before the film expired for my account. And I got to hear a little more about the background of the film. Sadly, I learned everyone in the film has passed away, except for one person. (Most of the people were elderly and I believe it some of the footage goes back to 2015.)
On a positive note, the director revealed that there was Instagram account for the film, with additional animations and video not used in the film, so there’s more film to explore.
As I mentioned above, it was my first time participating in this film festival. I think Film at Lincoln Center tends to host many types of film festivals, so I’ll try to pay more attention from now on.
There seemed to be something like 30 films, both online and in-person. The festival must have been fairly popular because many of the online films sold out or expired before I could watch them.
The line-up of online films seemed like a really nice mix. For instance, they had at least one option of short films (“Shorts”), which I often enjoy, but I didn’t watch any this time.
Anyway, definitely recommend watching any of the three films above, if the chance arises. In the meantime, I’ll take note for next year’s festival and onward to the next!
Title: Breakfast with Anish Melwani, Chairman & CEO of LVMH Inc (North America), In Conversation with Author Erwan Rambourg
Date: Wednesday, November 3, 2021
Description: In a thought-provoking conversation with author Erwan Rambourg (Future Luxe: What’s Ahead for the Business of Luxury, 2020), Anish Melwani will discuss the ever-increasing demand for iconic luxury goods in the United States.
In the early part of the talk, Melwani talked about his own background. Prior to his role at LVMH, he admitted he had not worked in luxury/prestige previously.
On creativity: He talked about his first meeting with Marc Jacobs (the actual person), and being blown away by the creativity he witnessed. He said compared to his previous experience at McKinsey, the creativity at LVMH was off the charts.
On the state of Luxury in North America: More customers are now shopping from home, leading to more access to shopping in smaller markets.
On the organization of LVMH: LVMH is decentralized, focused on Maisons (houses). That’s what makes it work — or it works despite these “inefficiencies”.
Creativity and competition at LVMH: Each Maison competes with each other to drive innovation and creativity. That’s what compensates for “inefficiencies”. From a conglomerate perspective, it would make more sense to consolidate the Maisons. But from a creative perspective, it doesn’t.
Was anything missing from LVMH? The interviewer or someone in the crowd asked if LVMH was missing anything. I don’t recall how this question ended in an answer on cosmetics or skincare, but I learned that LVMH owns Fenty skincare and Fresh. He talked about the wines and spirits division (perhaps in the context of recent acquisitions). And he mentioned that LVMH had acquired hotels and other properties via Belmond.
Fenty: A few points
Prior to this event, I did not know Fenty was part of LVMH.
He mentioned the fact that Fenty debuted with 40 shades of foundation, which was completely unheard of at the time due to being inefficient from a sales perspective because some shades sell out more than others. However, although this is the case, the point, he said, was to show the customer that they were seen (emphasis mine).
He also shared a comment from one of Rihanna’s Savage X Fenty shows — something about how customers can really see themselves on the stage/
The visibility, he said, is what leads to the idea of prestige. (Or something like that.)
Fenty came out of Kendo, an incubator in LA, specific to Sephora.
Fenty does well in the US, which is more diverse compared to Europe.
Personal side note regarding Fenty: Although they may have released 40 shades, and many of those shades don’t sell as well as others, I have had much difficulty finding foundation shades in my skin color — foryears. Colors are either too red/orange, too dark, too light…if they exist at all. They recently released a new product, Eaze Drop, a blurring skin tint. It’s extremely popular. My shade, #10, has been out of stock for MONTHS. It seems to me there is some business sense in creating these in-between shades.
As he correctly mentioned, an NFT is an address on a blockchain.
Events & Experiences
There is a high-demand for events, and demand for experiences is increasing. But what he’s not sure of is if there will be larger events in big cities, or many smaller events.
Using digital can help spread the experience around, which is kind of the traditional model. But he’s not sure what the model will be in the future, given technical advances and demand, etc.
As I was watching online, I wasn’t able to ask questions directly. The online viewers weren’t encouraged to add questions to the Zoom Q&A. But if I had been given the opportunity to ask questions, I would’ve asked this:
Leather/Fur: Seems like attitudes are changing about fur and meat, of which leather is a by-product. Any thoughts about that?
2nd-Hand Market: I didn’t have a specific question, but I was generally curious about the 2nd-hand market.
This was a really well-done, live online event. I didn’t get screenshots, but below each presenter were names and titles to describe what they did. It was really professional.
The only downside was sometimes when audience members would stand and ask questions, they sometimes begin speaking before getting the microphone. This happens at almost every event, with audience goers believing that since the people presenting and those around can hear them, the microphone picking up the event can also hear them. It cannot. Thankfully, FIAF corrected this very quickly right after one person began speaking.
I hope they produce more webinars like this again. Part of why I could not attend is because it was at 8:30AM, which is too inconvenient for me to go to and return home in time for work. Also, 8:30AM is pretty early. 🙂
Anyway, it was informative, produced very well, and very worthy of my time. I hope they do more morning series like these.
A report I created for an edX course, from July 2021. The exercise was an analysis on the pros and cons of a potential franchise opportunity.
For the course Introduction to Marketing, from the University of Edinburgh, from which I received a verified certificate in July 2021, I analyzed the potential benefits of a franchise as part of an assignment in Week 6: Delivering value and reaping the rewards.
I wrote this post in July to document my assignment.
The aim of the report is to make recommendations on whether or not to enter a franchising agreement with the selected firm.
Your report should be structured as follows:
Executive summary – Introduce the report aim as well as summary of your research.
Advantages of franchise – List benefits deriving from franchising agreements.
Disadvantages of franchise – Identify challenges related to franchise.
Recommendations – Make recommendation whether it is beneficial to enter franchising agreement or not.
The instructions also specified the report should be 1 page. I went over the limit by writing 2 pages, which I don’t necessarily think is a good thing. Succinct writing has its place. Perhaps I should’ve spent more time editing. On the other hand, I did find enough interesting information to fill 2 pages. So, here is my report.
This short report evaluates and recommends whether beginning a franchise opportunity with Century 21, a real estate franchisor, is a beneficial investment.
In summary, only the most experienced, well-researched, and well-funded potential franchisees should consider a franchise agreement; only those already working in real estate with a successful business of their own should consider, as the risk and costs can be quite high.
From their website, Century 21 (C21) claims to enhance your existing “entrepreneurial spirit” with:
The Scale and Buying Power of a Global Partner
Here is an examination of a few of these enhancements:
Comprehensive Training: C21 offers their 3-4 day “International Leadership Academy (ILA) Program”, at or near their HQ in New Jersey, USA, or another location of their choice. C21 will continue to offer continuing training opportunities in the form of written materials, email, consultation, or other means. They may also hold networking events or other educational opportunities.
Global Exposure: The C21 website says they operate in 80 countries and territories.
#bestinclass Marketing: This appears to refer to the use of C21 branding materials as well as working with their real estate -focused, marketing affiliates, such as advertising placements on real estate websites (“Homes.com”, “realtor.com”, etc). They also have a customer relationship management system and access to a PR studio. Here is what Century 21 says about their new brand identity: With a refreshed color palate that stays true to our iconic gold and black scheme, the new identity is more modern and distinctive than ever.
Additional Advantage: Competition. C21 will not grant another franchise location within a ¼ mile radius (402 meters) of another office.
Comprehensive Training: Training may not be free and could cost up to $2,200; additional training costs depend on the course and duration. Training must also be completed within 24 months of signing the franchise agreement. In addition, there are many sources of training related to real estate — Is the training offered by C21 high-quality or independently recognized?
Global Exposure: It’s really up to the franchisee to open an office in these locations. Each franchise operator will need pay attention to local real estate laws — regulations and laws can very widely across countries, territories, states, cities, and other jurisdictions.
#bestinclass Marketing: It’s not clear if access to marketing resources would be free of charge to any franchisee. Initial investment fees can be quite high for external signs ($800-$20,000), yard/open house signs ($2,000-$20,000), computer equipment and electronic data system ($5,000-$10,000), and other advertising ($0-$10,000). Ongoing use of the CRM is tentatively included, however their Lead Management System and other computer support could cost up to $5,000/year and $1,000-$2,000/year, respectively.
Costs: There are relatively high costs and requirements involved in the franchise agreement, such as maintenance, royalties (6%), the requirement of a guaranty by the franchisee and their spouse (even if the spouse is not involved), and other fees. The franchisor is not obligated to provide financing for the franchisee, though they may choose to do so. Initial estimated fees to start an office could range between $106,000-$456,750. A franchisee may also consider the services of an attorney and/or an accountant, and may want to look into insurance, and related to remain in compliance with real estate laws and taxes. It’s not clear if these costs are standard or unusual compared to other real estate franchisors.
Neither advantage nor disadvantage
Licenses and Regulation: Real estate is a highly regulated industry. If a franchise owner is not a licensed broker, they must retain a “responsible broker” who must comply with all applicable laws and regulations. The broker will need to go through their own training to obtain their license.
Terms: Each franchise is offered an initial term of 10 years. There are no renewal rights, though they may extend under different terms.
Depending on the location, it may be worthwhile to go into a franchise agreement. Some real estate markets could offer high enough returns to offset the costs related to fees, royalties, maintenance and upfront costs. For others, there may not be enough demand, or the demand for homes may not be consistent enough to justify costs. It would be up to the franchisee to do their own research to understand the potential and return of their desired market before getting into a franchise agreement with C21. In addition, the owner should have some knowledge of the rules and laws for their geographic location, to remain in compliance with the law.
[Choosing to franchise] is an option only for the most experienced, well-funded, and well-researched franchisee, probably already involved in the real estate market and potentially already a licensed broker of many years. Others should get more experience in real estate, in their area, before entertaining a franchise option.
So, there you have it! The findings are that franchising can be a good idea if you’re already experienced, know your market, and have the money to invest (or lose). But for new brokers, it not might be worth the investment until they’ve gained more experience.
Thoughts about the exercise
This was an interesting exercise. I liked the structure and the positives and negatives. It wasn’t as difficult as I might have thought to learn more about this franchise option. And in the end, making a recommendation was easier than I thought; the answer seemed obvious.
A few thoughts on the course
[Nov 2021] At the time I originally wrote this post, I’m not sure I was planning to pay for the certificate. It wasn’t my first marketing course. I decided to pay for the course because the lessons I learned kept popping into my head — particularly the importance of innovation and staying differentiated from competitors. I decided to get the certificate because I felt the lessons of the course were valuable enough to justify the purchase.
For my final Capstone project in a specialization course on Coursera, I completed a SWOT analysis. The full assignment was to select a business or organization and conduct a SWOT analysis. Specifically, we were to choose one item identified in the weakness or threats analysis and propose a solution. The final project was to create a 10-15 minute presentation, with the idea that it would be presented to executives at the company. For my SWOT analysis, I decided to analyze Netflix.
Why I Chose Netflix
Netflix is one of the most valuable US tech companies right now. In addition to that, I have been aware of their Culture memo, first published in 2009, which emphasizes a “treat employees like adults” approach to management, including as a “keeper test” approach to retention. I really wanted to dig deeper into this. My theory was that although Netflix’s (stock) seems to flourish with this approach, my intuitive sense was that there was more to it than that.
I was also once a Netflix DVD + streaming customer, from about 2006 to 2012. I completely quit Netflix in 2017. And Netflix has become the “N” in the list of FAANG workplaces tech workers supposedly aspire to join. Having had these experiences with the company, I was happy to find an opportunity to evaluate their business in a structured way.
I intended to include my full report here. Unfortunately, I felt there were a number of students plagiarizing other students’ work, writing suboptimal reports, or having an essay writer complete their project. For that reason, I won’t include my full report to avoid that fate. But I will include snippets from my main submissions.
The entire assignment was meant to be put together in six weeks, include the SWOT matrix, report, and presentation. The audience for each section was meant to be executives from the company, so everything should be written as though it were going to be presented to C-Suite executives.
An overview of the 3-part assignment is below. Following that, I have included snippets from each section.
Part 1: SWOT Matrix
A 1-page visual presentation of the SWOT analysis. (We could use a template supplied by the course, as well as our own software or tools, which is what I did.)
Part 2: Report
The report should be 7-10 pages, “(double-spaced with 12 point font and 1 inch margins)”. The report should consist of four distinct sections:
Introduction: Introduction and content setup.
Description: SWOT analysis. Visual should be included.
Discussion: Select one problem identified in the SWOT analysis and propose a solution.
Conclusions and Recommendations: Recap key findings and proposed recommendations.
Part 3: Presentation
“Create a 15-20- minute presentation to senior management…to enhance and reinforce your audience’s understanding of the most important points in your written report.”
Part 1, The Report: Weakness Identified and Proposal
The full requirements were to write a 7-10 page, double-spaced report about your chosen company. My analysis revealed that in contrast with their competitors, they only have one income stream. I proposed offering online courses that represent their values as a way to seek secondary income.
Part 2, SWOT Matrix: Weaknesses
Based on my research, I identified the following weaknesses:
Part 3, Proposal Presentation
My proposal was related to internal training. I’m only including a few slides from my presentation, which I created in Google Slides using a presentation template I’ve used in the past.
Well, I really do wish I could share my final SWOT matrix, report, and presentation. I worked hard on it and I’m really happy with how it turned out.
But, as I mentioned, due to rampant plagiarism, I don’t feel comfortable putting up any work. I suspect there will be people using my work anyway.
In any case, my reviewers gave me full marks on my final submission. The rubric includes points for:
Integrates and incorporates many practices, concepts, methods and techniques found in Career Success Specialization coursework.
Reflects extensive use of company research to provide considerable insight into the organization.
Demonstrates a thorough understanding of how SWOT analysis works.
The target problem chosen is well-defined and clearly stated.
Demonstrates considerable ability in applying a logical approach to finding a creative solution.
Information and ideas presented are consistently and critically analyzed, synthesized and well-supported.
The report is well-written, with exemplary use of logic, organization, flow, style, and mechanics to conform to good business English formats and practices.
The presentation slides reflect effective use of content, structure, textual and visual graphics to convey the intended message.
I got 3 points for each rubric item. 3 is the maximum.
One person left this feedback, “This was by far the best project I have graded. Well done!” So that’s nice.
Although I kind of wish I’d selected a different font for the report, I think the best way to conclude this is to say, Yay for me! 🙂
Self-regulation includes self-control and adaptability. It builds on self-awareness — we have to recognize our emotions in order to regulate them. One way we can use self-regulation is to recognize and think about our feelings to avoid becoming a victim of emotional hijacking.
A thought pattern of emotional hijacking is called Cognitive Distortion. Cognitive distortions are ways our mind convinces us of things that aren’t true. This way of thinking can reinforce negative thinking and emotions, keep us feeling bad about ourselves, and interfere with our ability to self-regulate.
I wanted to share this post about cognitive distortions because I recognized some of this type of thinking in myself. By sharing, maybe others will recognize this type of thinking, too, and learn how to address it before it gets out of hand.
In this post, I’ll provide a few examples of cognitive distortion, plus a few humorous examples from pop culture. I’ll then share 6 strategies for self-regulation and a few resources to find more information.
Examples of Cognitive Distortion
A few examples of cognitive distortion provided by the class include:
Jumping to Conclusions
Personalization and Blame
Magnification and Minimization
Seeing only in black and white.
An example of cognitive distortion includes polarized thinking. That is, instead of seeing variation, this line of thinking excludes all possible outcomes to only black or white options: success or failure, win or lose, friend or foe, etc. But there’s often more nuance than those two extremes.
Something is everything.
Another example of cognitive distortion is overgeneralization. In this case, it means taking the negative outcome of one event or experience and concluding all similar experiences or events will result in the same outcome. Or concluding that the one bad outcome was due to an inherent character flaw. Ex: Going on one bad date means you’re terrible at relationships.
You are not a clumsy fool.
In this example, you identify with your shortcomings. This is the same as tripping on a broken sidewalk and instead of saying, “The city should fix this sidewalk. It’s dangerous,” you say, “Oh, of course I tripped. I’m clumsy!”
Jumping to Conclusions
You are not a psychic.
There are two examples of this. One is called mind reading. This is assuming other people are reacting negatively to you, even though there’s no evidence for it. Ex: The security guard at work didn’t say hello this morning, so you assume it’s because they don’t like you anymore. It could be because they were distracted or having a bad day.
The other example of jumping to conclusions is fortune telling, which is predicting things will turn out badly, also without evidence. Ex: You decide not to apply to a job in which you’re objectively qualified because you tell yourself you won’t get it anyway.
Personalization and Blame
Who really done it?
In the case of personalization, you may blame yourself for an outcome that you weren’t entirely responsible for. For instance, you’re on a creative team for a big client. Unexpectedly, the client decides to cancel all accounts and withdraw from the agency entirely. While there are multiple people working on this client’s account, you put all the blame on yourself for their decision.
Blame is when you overlook how your own behavior could have contributed to an outcome. For instance, perhaps the security guard from above didn’t say hello to you this morning because you never say hello back, and today was the day they just stopped trying.
Magnification and Minimization
Live in a van down by the river! orTis but a scratch!
In magnification, this is an example of taking a single bad outcome and blowing it way out of proportion. Ex: You went on a date that went poorly, so this means that for the rest of your life you’ll never find someone to settle down with…which means you’ll die alone and no one will come to your funeral. Or you didn’t get a perfect score on the SAT, which means you’ll never get into Harvard, which means you’ll have to go to community college…which of course you’ll fail out of and then end up homeless on the street.
Minimization is taking something that should rightly be of concern and shrinking it’s importance. Ex: You have pains in your stomach, but tell yourself it will go away on its own. A child in 3rd grade is still reading at a 1st grade level, but it’s overlooked instead of trying correct it or understand why this is the case. There’s find incontrovertible evidence a spouse is having an affair, but it’s dismissed. You discover financial fraud at work, but say it’s no big deal.
If you want to read a few more examples, there are links at the end. But first, here are a few examples from pop culture.
Pop Culture Examples of Magnification and Minimization
I guess this type of distortion can seem so wildly ridiculous it can seem hilarious to others, and we can find examples in pop culture. It is funny, but it also shows that it’s not uncommon. It happens so often, to so many people, and going back so many centuries…we can all be in on the joke. (So if you find yourself identifying with one of these examples, remember to not identify with your shortcomings: you’re not a magnification-ist!)
A few examples of magnification and minimalization are from Saturday Night Live, Monty Python, and Shakespeare.
Example 1: The Saturday Night Live skit, Van Down By The River, is a funny take on magnification. A motivational speaker is brought in to talk to the teenagers about drugs and their future, but he blows everything out of proportion and says that if they keep making bad choices they’ll live in a van down by the river — just like he does.
Example 2: Monty Python and The Holy Grail has a hilarious take on minimization in the Black Knight scene. Arthur reaches a “bridge”, which is defended by a knight dressed in black. He’s offered a position at court, but the knight doesn’t accept and refuses to let Arthur pass. A battle begins, with Arthur eventually cutting off one of the knight’s arms. Instead of conceding the battle the knight says, “Tis a scratch!” and continues fighting. Despite further devastating injuries, the knight remains obstinately defiant, saying things like, “I’ve had worse.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Knight_(Monty_Python)
Example 3: There is a similar line from Romeo and Juliet, after Mercutio and Tybalt duel. Mercutio says, “Ay, ay, a scratch, a scratch. Marry, ’tis enough. Where is my page?—Go, villain, fetch a surgeon.” Ironically, Mercutio is not engaging in minimization, as he promptly asks for a doctor. He has recognized the seriousness of his injury. But, by calling it “a scratch”, he uses irony to convey his message which perhaps causes others to minimize the seriousness of his wound, because they assume that he’s joking.
Self-Talk: Where Cognitive Distortion Begins
Part of the reason we begin engaging in this type of thinking is because we let our self-talk get out of control. Self-talk is that inner voice we all have. But sometimes it can become negative and damage our ability to self-manage. We let our inner voice create our outer reality.
Strategies for Self-Regulation
The course discussed a few strategies for self-regulation.
Take control of your self-talk. Recognize when you’re doing it and when it’s getting out of control.
Focus on your freedoms, not your limitations. Getting stuck on your limitations is demoralizing and can conjure negative feelings. Focus on remaining flexible and open.
Find something to learn from everyone you encounter. This can be hard, but try to do it even after encountering people you find irritating, annoying, or critical of you. Perhaps you will learn patience from those people. Try to find something to gain from every encounter.
Stop and think. Take a moment to stop and think before responding. Hard to do in the moment! Try to think about how you can learn from the situation.
Focus on a purpose. I strongly recommend this Coursera course on learning to live a life of purpose: Finding Purpose and Meaning In Life: Living for What Matters Most. I wrote two posts about my experience with this course. Read Part One and Part Two.
Talk less and listen more. Listening doesn’t mean agreeing, but it does mean making an effort to understand. This effort will demonstrate empathy and make for a better relationship.
Another strategy is to try journaling. Journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts and help you catch destructive or counterproductive self-talk. You can write about concerns, accomplishments, disappointments, interactions with other people, and positive and negative incidents in your life.
This post began with a brief introduction to self-regulation as a key component of emotional and social intelligence, or ESI.
I introduced cognitive distortion which is a way our mind can convince us of things that aren’t true.
A few examples of cognitive distortion include polarized thinking, overgeneralization, labeling, jumping to conclusions, personalization and blame, and magnification and minimization.
Pop culture examples of magnification and minimization show that cognitive distortions can be very common and widespread. No one should feel unique if they find that they’ve been thinking this way. (Don’t label, overgeneralize, or personalize!)
I explained that cognitive distortion can begin with negative self-talk — that is, we let our inner voice become negative.
Finally, I gave a few strategies for self-regulation, to help get back on track.
Self-Reflection: As I mentioned at the top, when I learned about cognitive distortion, I recognized some of this type of thinking in myself. Although it’s better to avoid this type of thinking, it was a comfort to have a name for it. And the pop culture examples helped me see it’s so common we can joke about it. I hope this post is helpful for someone else.
I plan to continue learning more about cognitive distortions. I’ve included a few additional resources below with more information.
David Burn’s Book “Feeing Good: The New Mood Therapy” (New York: William Morrow & Company, 1980, Signet, 1981), is apparently a seminal book on the topic. More information about this book can be found on the author’s website, feelinggood.com.
Web: As I linked to above, Greater Good Magazine has many helpful articles which can help with self-regulation. Find them at greatergood.berkeley.edu.
Course: I took a great course that explained purpose and how to live a life with purpose. It is offered by the University of Michigan on Coursera. Finding Purpose and Meaning In Life: Living for What Matters Most. I highly recommend this course. Greater Good Magazine also has a course on finding happiness in life, though I have yet to sign up.